Sure, but we think a ton about anxiety in coaching! Fear pushes us off, leads us to pause, procrastinate, put off and finally ruin our dreams. I'm sure you've heard a number of stuff about terror and I know you've felt it many times too!
I'm going to let you in on a little secret today and that's; Anxiety has Layers. Even if you believe you've conquered the anxiety, what you've really achieved is to conquer an anxiety of the surface, but there's something more that may be far further underneath. So I was talking about it coming up with Halloween, it's a nice opportunity to discuss anxiety a little more so I want to speak to you today about not being nice enough at 'it' The Feeling of Not Being Good Enough at 'IT' IT is special for everybody. Currently, with this anxiety, I'm not talking about the usual thoughts and anxiety of 'not feeling good enough'- I'm talking about what occurs when a fear of not being good enough is a standard way of thinking or a 'fixed mentality.'
Let me explain: I used to do cross country and race in school at a distance of 100 metres. Sports Days at high school- I enjoyed them! I had the tag of 'Sonic' yes the hedgehog during the first few weeks of high school, yes I know it was stupid now but back then I was only so proud of it and the mark encouraged me to run harder. Instead the tournaments- county and country competitions began. All of a sudden I was no longer the best. I was, in truth, fairly average and poor. My abilities hadn't been strong enough. So instead, what was the point? My attitude changed very easily from 'This is nice, I'm very good at it' to 'I'm not good enough anymore because I'm not interested.' To say the truth, it wasn't that I wasn't interested, I was deeply, but until that point it was just too fast and normal for me and I never learned to function with it. In the end, I was leaving and I began to vape to double on the lies.
For years, this unique attitude of 'not good enough' in regards to my health existed with me and it is now my default environment. When I go to a college, a boot camp, or something else, and it doesn't come easily, or sound pleasant, or sound simple, the temptation is to go. But I Think it's because I've never known how to function on it, I've never understood that commitment and preparation is more critical than instant consequences – does that make sense? Then I realize intellectually that I have to force myself to comply, to do so sometimes though I don't feel like it.
So, I'm wondering- where in your life has this tale been played out?
What is no longer normal to you and the automatic action is to stop it or to procrastinate? I deal through it with other clients in terms of their wellness, weight and activity objectives. Similar to me, it used to come naturally and effortlessly before it did not happen all of a sudden and now that field of life is just sucking! So no matter what menu schedules you're making, or what fitness routine you're signed up to, you're just following ahead with remaining positive!
Or how about at college- do you know when you used to do your job and you were going to get a grade? You will get straightforward comments—well achieved, require change, nice initiative, etc., but just crickets as you reached the 'true world.' Any reviews, any commendation, no 'well finished' The laws are different — instead of waiting for your feedback to be needed, you need to think to someone else — maybe even disturb some mid-sentence men. It feels rough, it feels awkward, and what's going on with certain people is that you're back off, still, you're not improving like you'd thought you'd, so every day your self-esteem and morale gets chipped away a little more. The huge hopes you've had about yourself and for your future no longer appear in your mind. You continue to think you're not 'strong enough at it' – whatever 'it' may be and it's safer if you just put your head down.
The argument I want to drive home is that we resist, reject, procrastinate, don't follow ahead and don't fulfill our goals because we're afraid to pursue because we figure out we're not strong enough at 'it.' Having it as a hope or a fantasy so we might fantasize about is better than putting the energy into having something work and realizing out we're not strong enough (or so the anxiety would tell you!).
No comments:
Post a Comment